MUSIC

I assumed my entire life that I was going to be a musician. My dad taught me how to use a record player when I was very young, and exploring the parental vinyl collection was a near-magical experience, introducing me and permanently sensitizing me to the incredible wonder of music. (I can still recall the handful of records that I first loved: INXS's Kick; Iron Butterfly's In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida; the Ventures' Golden Greats; and the discographies of Rush, the Yardbirds, and Yes.) I learned to read and write early because I was making mix tapes and wanted to be able to label their contents. I started playing drums at six, guitar at nine. I started my first band when I was twelve, played my first show on my fifteenth birthday. So integral was music to my life that it formed the soundtrack to every major phase of self-development: through my twenties, I can think of every important thing I discovered, every important change I made, as occurring to at least some degree in conversation with the music I was obsessing over at the time.

All I ever wanted was to earn my place among the luminaries who had so powerfully influenced and inspired me. But after 20 years of recording, 20-ish projects, countless shows, and thousands of dollars of investment, I finally had to admit that it wasn't going to happen for me. That's when I began to pursue my other passion, and went to grad school.

Music isn't as central in my life anymore, but I still think it's one of the most amazing things humankind has ever done, and I remain enamored with it. I've even begun to create some more of my own, although I no longer fantasize about it having the significance in the world that much of my favorite music does. Below you'll find what I'm up to as well as some of the stuff I did in my first 30 years of life. I'm very proud of a lot of it, and I hope to share more of it someday.

FEAR OF DANCING

I play guitar (live) for this noisy alt-punk band, which began as the strictly tape-based home recording project of Sam Buonavolonta, better known as the force behind Sam Goodwill.

Discography:

Turn Heel (Historian, 2022)
This Music Never Touched a Computer (Historian, 2021)

RAM'S HEAD (2003-2008)

Ram's Head was the solo electronic project of my best friend, Karl Steffey (1984-2011). It began as a dark, confrontational, intentionally dehumanized experiment in teaching himself programming. Karl, however, was a person of deep thought and feeling, and as he developed his talents, he couldn't help but insert the poetic intensity of his personality and experiences into Ram's Head's music. The result was music that testifies powerfully - and tragically - to the vivid, lived reality of a man who is no longer here, and was never heard in his time.

When Karl died, I took it upon myself to make the Ram's Head material available, and I have so far released one LP (see below). It captures him on the line, about to transform the original vision for Ram's Head into what it became. That means, at least as far as I'm concerned, that the best is yet to come. I'm the only person who has this music, and I hope I get the chance to make more of it - more of Karl - available to the world.

Discography:

Last of the Lost (LP, Bastion, 2013)



OLDER PROJECTS

Northern Beaches (guitar/bass/vocals, 2010-2013) [link]
Til HeiĆ°urs Um (everything, 2007)
World Line (guitar/bass/vocals, 2006-2009)
Silver Linings (guitar/vocals, 2006)
Sewercide (drums, 2006)
Free Minds Association (guitar/vocals, 2005)
Journey into Darkness (guitar, 2003-2005, 2008)
Orange Alert (drums, 2003)
Shelter (guitar, 2003) [link]
Armed Battery (guitar, 2002-2003)
Laws (drums, 2001-2013)
Run Devil Run (guitar, 2001-2002)
Inner Revolution (vocals, 2001-2003)
Soul Cries (guitar/vocals, 2000-2004)
Proof Positive (guitar, 1999)
Direction (vocals, 1998-2000)
Incite (drums, 1998)
Missing Image (guitar/vocals, 1994-1997) [link]

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